The first question any reporter asks me when interviewing me about employment with a chronic illness is: Should people disclose? As if there is a sound bite response.
In case you haven’t noticed, Richard Cohen’s new book, (he’s Meredith Viera’s husband), “Strong at the Broken Places”, has gotten major media attention. Good news for us it highlights the issues people with chronic illness face. Cohen wrote about how multiple sclerosis affected his career in his first book, Blindsided. And, now this past weekend, Lisa Belklin, wrote a piece for The New York Times, ” I’m Ill But Who Really Needs to Know? ” (notice this was in the Style section - not Health.)
Belkin describes how Cohen hid his disease from his employers until he no longer could — and he felt that he’d proven his value. Gayle Backstrom, author of I’d Rather Be Working (there’s an interview of Gayle and me speaking on HealthTalk.com on my website) suggests people keep an illness to themselves as long as possible because it is “safer. A 3rd person chose to disclose because she felt she had a strong enough track record and people might otherwise notice her symptoms and come to the wrong conclusions. The 4th person hid her disease for year until she felt that it would get in her way - and then disclosed. All valid stuff.
But, the article missed a key point. There’s a developmental component to this question. It’s more difficult to disclose when you’re young (and everyone else is healthy), when you haven’t proven your worth (your career isn’t stable) and you’re still uncertain about what this illness means in your life.
We devote a chapter to looking to the relationship between disease diagnosis, life point, and career in our book, Women, Work and Autoimmune Disease: Keep Working, Girlfriend! If you’re stuck - or just wondering if there’s a different approach from what you’ve done, my Guidebook, Are Your Talking, explores the pros and cons of disclosure in detail and gives concrete suggestions for when, where and how.
Have you found that you think differently about talking about your illness at work over the years? What has changed for you?
Rosalind
aka cicoach.com The resource for professionals with chronic illness
I suffer from chronic major depression and fibromyalgia and have found that it has a negative influence whether you disclose your illness or not. I unfortunately let my illness take control of my life and my job became secondary. In this day and age, unless you have a visible illness, you just can’t do that without repercussions. My depression is in remission but I am still paying the price of divulging it’s existence. I have been moved to less visible projects and have been denied access to career development (I work in IT). It’s frustrating because I felt so incredibly awful (read suicidal) and rather than throwing me a life preserver my manager threw me an anchor making my life miserable. It still feels like I am being punished for being depressed and anxious on the job.
Hi Robyn, It’s tye that there is a lot of stigma aroudn this, particularly depression. It sounds as if your illness impacted yor performance and that was a sore point for others. It’s not clear from what you write if and at what point you disclosed, but the fact is that there is little tolerance for poor — or decreased productivity. What have you done to show them that you’re “back on track” again? Rosalind
It really angers me that someone who has a physical illness is treated much more differently than someone with a mood illness. At the same time that I was struggling with depression a coworker was diagnosed with cancer. This person was treated very differently from me. I have been taking meds and doing therapy for 3 years and am in remission. I’ve been working very hard but now I am coping with caregiving for my parent who has alzheimer’s. It never ends. I’m trying to take care of myself so that I don’t have a relapse.
Robyn, I understand your frustration. Many people with diseases like Fibromyalgia (which you also have) get similar treatment -because it’s so poorly understood. On the scale of treatment, Cancer tends to be the easiest for “healthy” people to relate to not only becuase it’s so prevalent — but there is treatment that sometimes can cure. But, in the end - any CHRONIC illness (meaning no cure) that affects someone’s ability to fully contribute and do her job is going to provoke resentment in most work environments. You’re smart to take care of yourself through this period with your parent — and I”‘m sure it’s not easy. Perhaps over time, you can regain the trust of your co workeres as you stay focused on your work.
Rosalind
Your point about if you’re young and unestablished is a GREAT point. I think every person’s take on their situation has to be individualized. There’s no possible way for each person to confront this problem (and those of us with chronic illnesses and careers all face it at some point) the same way. This, I think, is truer even more in high pressure career paths. If you’re still trying to prove your worth and your value then you are doing everything possible to keep anything viewed as negative out of the limelight.
Thanks for posting this!
I’m glad that this is helpful. Rosalind
I truly believe you have to feel out the boss and the co-workers before you disclose this information.
I say this only because places I have been employed previously, don’t give a damn what’s going on with you. They just want the job done. Which is okay from the business stand point. But if you can’t take care of yourself and you’re under the gun, employers need to accept that to. It’s part of the employee.
Now I worked in the health care field as a scheduler, and everyone knew what I was all about. They supported me. We joked about it many, many times and I feel had I not disclosed the information on all the illnesses I had, they probably would of thought I was weird or something. I turned my illnesses into a benefit by inspiring my co-workers and showed them just because I had problems, I could still do my job and very well. I could relate to the clients and their families due to what I had been through. I made them laugh and feel comfortable.
I feel it’s all about how you present this information. If I would of used it for an excuse, I wouldn’t of been supported at all. I was just honest, threw some humor in the mix and worked as hard as I could. ( You know, like women always do!)
Joni Waseity Beadle is an author and entrepreneur for
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I just found your site through Jolie Nadine’s blog (http://jolienadine.com) and am so grateful to have discovered this fantastic resource! I’ve already pre-ordered your book and look forward to getting it.
When I was diagnosed with Crohn’s in 2002 (four years later it was amended to ulcerative colitis), I had taken a couple of days off for my colonoscopy. By then I’d been working for my boss for about three months and had proven to him that I was an invaluable asset to the company. Because my case was relatively mild, I never missed a day of work and never exhibited any symptoms that would lead anyone to believe I had ANY disease.
I’ve since left that job but have always been upfront with my subsequent employers about my illness…AFTER I’d proven myself. Because my disease isn’t advanced, I don’t feel that it’s anyone’s business until I’m comfortable disclosing that info. I did eventually work for that aforementioned boss again at a different company, during which time I did have a couple of serious flare-ups. He did make a comment about how much sick leave I was taking but otherwise didn’t mention it again.
Now I work from home as a part-time freelance writer and would-be novelist. It makes it easier as I can schedule my doctor’s appointments and get all the rest I need. But I do think that if I were to return to the workforce I would follow the same principle: prove myself first, then disclose later (if necessary).
Cheers,
Marjorie
HI Marjorie
Sorry it took so long for me to respond. I”ve been on vacation, out of the country and “off email”.
I, too, was first diagnosed with Crohn’s and then it turned out to be ulcerative colitis.Great point you made about disclosing after you’ve proven yourself - especially if it doesn’t get “in your way”. Your bosses comment about your absences are setriking, though. It’s those comments that can be so undermining. I’m curious if this affected how you felt about him after this - or yourself?
Rosalind